I was challenged today to come up with my understanding of connection. And I realized Connection can be many different things. Of course there can also be DISconnection when these conditions no longer exist.
First there is the connection between different parts of the body. We want to be connected when we move. For example, when we squat we don’t want to raise the head first or the bum first but everything together. When we walk we want the foot to be connected to the calf to the thigh. That is the explicit connection I think of due to my background but there are also other forms of connection.
Connection can also be within our bodies, what some call mind-body connection. This is also the biggest disconnect I see. Our reliance on our eyes and visual system (think the proliferation of the internet and television and watching sport etc) encourages us to experience with our eyes alone but what about the other five senses (including the body sense, what people call proprioception)? This is why when I ask someone where the sensation is they cannot tell me. Because they have already lost touch with their own bodies. Things like academics and books encourage us to live in our heads but remember the video I posted earlier on ‘Why do we have a brain?’. Well we need to stop living in our heads and ignoring the rest of ourselves. A big disconnect occurs here with the ‘no pain no gain’ crowd. Pain is a signal from your body that something is not quite right and should be heeded. Pain is not, as some describe, weakness leaving your body. These folk need to see a strongman who said that they should pay him $1000 and he would hit them over the head with a baseball bat. Win win then right?
This disconnect with our own bodies is also seen in emotional and binge eating when we eat because we are bored, we are sad, lonely, etc. The eating is an outlet not for sustenance but which serves a different purpose. A purpose that we are not meeting in our lives.
There is also connection between our paths and who we really are. When we follow our hearts we are probably tuning in and connecting with our real selves, the centre of our being. But when we let societal or other pressures dictate our lives then disconnect occurs. Like artists who are coerced one way or other into being scientists. Or athletes who feel they have to be business people. Teachers who become lawyers or accountants because that is what they feel they should do rather than what they necessarily want to do.
Connection can also be between ourselves and the task at hand. Disconnect is when we try to do ‘two things at once’. When we eat in front of our devices be it tv, tablet, smartphone, computer, or even when we are too busy talking to someone else to truly taste our food then we are only eating the menu. When we go through the motions and tune out then we are also disconnecting with the task at hand. If you are ‘meditating’ but only running through your day in your head then you are also disconnected.
Connection can be between ourselves and the environment. Drive anywhere and you can see people crossing the road whilst so immersed in their phone communications that if it were not for the aware driver, then they would have been run over. They are not aware of their surroundings, a big problem in the martial world.
Connection can be between ourselves and another. When we find something in common or share something with someone else then we are connecting. But when we lose touch with someone or consciously shut them out then we are disconnecting.
Connection can also be to time, to the moment. Paying attention to what is really happening in and around us. Many people are afraid to be alone or by themselves and get bored easily. That is only because they are not paying attention. So many things are going on. If only they could see with more than their eyes. Learn to be rather than just to do. We are human BEings after all.
Lastly, connection can also be awareness. Connecting with any and all of the situations above, awareness of ourselves, our bodies, our surroundings, etc.
Connection as awareness. This is probably the most powerful meaning of connection. Especially if we want to change something. If we want to get somewhere the most important thing to do is to first know where we are, yet too many people focus only on where they want to go. You need both.
Awareness before change.
It’s as simple as ABC.