Just enjoy the ride

The modern age is all about goal setting, summits and getting ahead.  But it is also a time of chronic fatigue, stress and disease. Maybe there is a correlation here.  Maybe we need to look deeper.

I see a lot of hypertensive, musculoskeletal and cardiopulmonary clients.  For those who do not speak medical lingo that is people with chronic stress (overwhelmed), sore and achey joints and muscles and heart/lung conditions.  Often all of the above because they are out of alignment.  With their own bodies, their own selves and their environment.

If we are born soft, supple and supported by Mother Earth why do we try to break out of this natural condition.

Why do so many feel the need and desire to double over striving for something that may or may not come.  To lose themselves by being pulled out of their centre striving and straining to achieve something that they will no longer care about once they get there.  It shows in strained necks, shoulders, backs.  Look at the picture of the cyclists below!  Strain, stress and tension.

That is not to say that having a target is not good but that do not be taken away from the journey by the target.  See another great picture below.

You can enjoy the journey but remember that you are always simply sitting in the saddle.  When you sit, sit.

Enjoy the journey, the practice, the training.  And you will surprised where it will take you if you just continue to practice with persistence.

And remember what Nelson Mandela said about there simply being many more summits after one has reached a summit.

Sit well

I’ve received a few things in my mail lately condemning sitting.  Yes, sitting.  Sitting is an oft maligned activity, with some even being described as the modern equivalent of smoking.  It supposedly causes things from back pain,  shoulder pain and knee pain through to obesity,  diabetes and even cancer. Reduced life expectancy and switching off of postural muscles and reflexes.

I disagree.

As always,  the how is more important than what.

I rarely see people sit well, so I am not surprised when the same people blame sitting for their problems.  The answer is not changing position regularly, buying an expensive chair or using a swiss ball. Simply standing up is also not the solution as standing is more difficult and, for most people, it is simply trading one unbearable position for another.

Learning to sit properly is the answer.

Be still like a mountain.  Or simply sit like a baby.

So how then?

What is the best chair/seat?

Surprisingly, it is often the more expensive chairs that are the most poorly designed ergonomically.  I don’t care if they are designed by some fancy and famous designer.  I only care if they work.

Firstly you do NOT need back support.  Back support is just that, superfluous support that teaches you NOT to sit properly because something else is propping you up artificially.

And the spine is NOT supposed to be S shaped.

You do NOT even need any of these wedge style products.  I’ve tried, seen and owned various implements and not found any to be more than expensive cushions.

None of the above are necessary.

Not if you learn to sit properly.

Well let me tell you that you already carry the best seat you will every come across everyday.  It is called your bottom.  The best thing to sit on is the floor or a flat stool.  You can sit in Indian or Japanese styles and you can even utilise a flat sitting cushion if you like a bit of padding.  But it is not essential.

Sitting well can help physiologically, psychologically and spiritually. It can help you relax,  release and heal.
It can help you settle and make your core stronger. I had a client come to me with postural issues and once I had cued her into a more efficient position, in our first 15 minutes together, she reported that she felt her abdominal muscles engage. I also received a text not long after our session reporting how grounded she felt after. All we had done was talk and correct her sitting.  Sitting can help build stronger abdominals.  If you do it properly.  It is my go to activity if I am feeling a bit stiff and sore as it helps me recalibrate my systems.

Just like any other movement, do it wrong and of course you will be hurt.

As always with life,  the choice and responsibility is yours.

What is the best exercise?

Now this is a question that I get asked a lot, in all its different flavours.  What should I do?  What should I do more of?  People are looking for secret techniques and magic forms.  But they do not exist.

Often I turn the question around.  What do you think the best exercise is?

To which I get a whole bunch of answers ranging from what the individual thinks my answer is to what they really think.

Let me ask you!  What is the best exercise?

Is it the kettlebell swing? Snatch? Squat? Chest press? Deadlift? Running? Pushups? Pullups? Pistols? Clubs? Sword?

Well?  The best answer and the only really correct one is “it depends!”.

It depends on the individual, his/her goals and his/her abilities and willingness to invest in terms of time/learning.  It’s not what you do but how you do it.

But here are some criteria that I apply.

Is it safe? Can the individual in question perform it safely enough that no harm/injury will result from performance of the exercise?  Is the exercise actually within the individual’s ability that he/she can actually benefit from it?

This is actually a much bigger hurdle than you would think as a lot of exercises and training that I see is simply a waste of time due to the individual often picking something too difficult (and often because they see someone more advanced performing the exercise).  Sure, it can be something to learn but it is not effective to be trained for volume as the individual cannot handle it.  This often leads to injury especially in the modern age where the “no pain no gain” attitude is so prevalent.

Is it effective and a good use of the individual’s time/effort?  Well, this depends on what the individual’s goals are.  Unless the individual has specific goals, then general training is good.   But if the individual has specific goals AND already has a good general baseline (which many do NOT have before endeavouring to train specific skills) then the exercise/s may vary.

Is the individual willing to do it often enough to get benefits? Regular deposits are required.  It is a lifestyle, a practice.  A well known coach has a saying that if something is important then you should do it everyday.  If you think about what is really important, like sleeping, eating, drinking etc…

Will the individual do it long enough to get real benefits? See above.  How far the individual wishes to go is up to him/her.  “Step by step walk the thousand mile road.”

So now ask yourself the questions above and you will be closer to finding your answer.  Where do you want to go?  Have you got the skills to get there?  Can anyone show you the way?  Most people I encounter are not willing to invest time and effort into practicing the basics often enough to get them where they claim to wish to go.  And that’s fine.  Maybe set a different course.  One that you can navigate and follow it.

You determine how far you go on the path.

And just remember, there are no magic bullets.

The problem with most modern training

It may not appear like it but the last two pieces I’ve written, firstly about disconnection and then about training mistakes are related.  This third piece in the series will highlight how certain types of training lead to some undesired effects in the rest of our lives.  To me this implies that such means are futile and a better use of your time can be found.

Most forms of modern resistance training, be it bodybuilding, powerlifting or even pilates, are focussed on developing muscular strength with tension.  The focus may be on superficial (surface layer) or deep (underneath the surface layer) muscles but they have the same focus.  They are two dimensional in nature.  They are mere activities without real purpose.

These muscle building regimes involve tightening muscles to produce an action.  “Squeeze ‘muscle of choice’ to produce ‘action of choice'” seems to be the modern approach.  This production of tension carries over into everyday life because the body, mind, spirit is really the bodymindspirit.  So tensions we create within the bodies remain in the mind and the spirit.  So for all those people who find it difficult to unwind (aka stressed), who are easily overwhelmed or carry lots of muscular aches and tensions (if you answer ‘not really’ then it is really a qualified yes but you do not wish to admit it) then perhaps this is not a particularly good method in the long run.

I often have friends, family, clients, and even strangers tell me that “exercise x makes me sore/tight/injured in part a/b/c of my body” or “after I train at night I can’t sleep hours later”.  To which I ask “why do you do it?”.   Does it not sound a little masochistic and self defeating to you too?  Because not only is this stress, this tension being programmed into the body but you actually understand that this process is occurring.  And still you do it!!!

Is this not creating a disconnect in your life???  That is why you tune out, because you know deep down that serves no purpose, that you are simply picking some activity to kill time.  It is not a dance in the wider sense but torture.  That is why you are stressed before, during and after the activity.  It is a downward spiral.

Then when you meet some form of resistance, whether emotional, psychological or physical, in real life your first instinct will be to tense up.  You can’t help it because you have programmed and keep programming into your bodymindspirit.  So you will react in either freeze, flight or fight. This spiral continues and you will wonder what happened with your life years later.

3 common training mistakes

In my work I see many people making the same mistakes over and over again with respects to their training, irrespective of what form/style/type it is.

They do not understand the purpose of training.

I wish to address a few of the most common ones among both amateurs and professionals alike.

Mistake number one.

Most people exercise to expend energy.  They exercise to lose/maintain weight so their purpose is merely to expend energy.  It doesn’t really matter what they do as long as they do it long enough or hard enough to burn excess energy.  If that is the goal, would not taking a closer look at the dietary, hormonal and sleep side of things make more sense?

What they are really training themselves to do is to be tired! Imagine that!   People spend good money and time to make themselves fatigue in the hope and belief that it will make them better/stronger.  Being sore and achey is just an added bonus, the icing on the cake. Of course this group of people get bored, lose interest and decide it’s all too hard.  Because it is a chore.  Their training has no purpose and should really be seen as physical activity, for which there are better substitutes like farming, and gardening.  At least then you get vegetables instead of a trip to your chiro, physio or other smash repairer of choice.

Needless to say that when the burn is the goal then the process doesn’t matter much to them.  “It’s ok, it’s helping me burn lots of calories”  is what I often hear when I offer to help prevent an injury from (re)occurring.  “There’s no need to get technical, it’s not like I’m a professional or competing.”

Ohhhkay then!

Then the second most common mistake I see people make with regards to their training is that they use it as a form of entertainment.  They treat their training like they are watching tv.  Like their favourite tv shows, their schedule consists of the same thing over and over with no clear plot line.  This is in fact related to the first mistake.  With the first mistake, people see training as a chore whereas in the second, they convince themselves that it is something they like.  Then why the grimaces and looks of anguish then?

So how to get past these mistakes?  Firstly, find some activity that you really enjoy.  Not because some friend, expert or scientific study told you was good for you.  That will make you a, b or c (or a, b AND c!).

That is not enjoyment.

For once you find something that you really enjoy it will not be about what you can get out of the activity but simply an avenue for cultivation.

Which brings me to mistake number three.  Lack of patience and understanding that the fruits of labour take time to cultivate. Training is like gardening and farming.  First one must prepare the soil and the environment so that growth can occur.   Throwing seeds on barren rocks will yield nothing.  And constantly digging up any growing plants to see how they are going will do nothing except kill the poor things.  One must trust in the process and allow things to develop at their own pace.

The best way for that is to learn from and/or train with people who have gone before you.  Of course whether you have the right ‘teacher’ depends on what you want to learn.

Disconnection

Listening to an interview with a minor celebrity talking about his life and he keeps talking about how at work he is Person A, at home Person B, and socially Person C.  That is a very common affliction in modern times.

I see many people who, whether they tell you verbally or not, are overwhelmed and burnt out by the way they have chosen to live their lives.  It may be a temporary situation for some while for others it is something more chronic.  It happens to the average Joe but it seems to me that it happens more to carers.  These are the people who look after others out of duty, choice or simply because it their profession.  They do not realise that to take care of others they must first take care of themselves.

Often it is due to a disconnect somewhere in their lifestyle.  I wrote about various aspects of connection back in May.  This often occurs because they do not make time to reconnect with themselves regularly until they feel they are burnt out.  Interestingly enough, that piece on connection occurred when I encountered my first explicit case of burn out.  Now I understand a lot more about it.

The feeling of being burnt out arises because people cannot understand that everything is connected.  These people allow themselves to be pulled apart in different directions in their lives and are then somehow surprised when they feel broken.  Work is one thing, their social life another,while their hobbies and pursuits another still.  Finally, there is the aspect of their lives where they have to look after themselves in whatever shape or form they can conceive be it exercise, their own time or whatever practice they choose to pursue.

Each different aspect pulling in a different direction so that the feeling is one of being hung, drawn and quartered.  It doesn’t really matter whether it is out of a sense of duty, expectations or habit because the outcome is the same.  Like a balloon that is overinflated it will eventually burst.

It is like any other illness, or imbalance.  The imbalance requires addressing or it will build up and then collapse the system and force a realignment of sorts.  This is the enforced rest during “illness”.  Interestingly enough, the latter will become a spiral where the individual will feel like they just keep getting sucked deeper and deeper underwater because they are trying to fight the current.  The first step is to stop fighting the water because one simply cannot win.

The only way is to reconnect the dots and the disparate aspects of their lives.  The individual needs to ask some hard questions and seek help.  You can offer a hand but more often than not the individual is so overwhelmed that in their panic they cannot see what is in front of them.

The individual must realise that taking care of their own lives is the first and most important part of taking care of others.  For one cannot share what one does not have.  Learn to find the alignment, breath and connection in your life.

Learning to connect is a physical, psychological and spiritual journey but it cannot be enforced onto another.  All we can do is watch and wait.  And be there when they are ready.

Like the saying about horses and water, one cannot make another drink.